How Do Attachment Styles Influence Your Relationships?

When it comes to romantic relationships, we all seem to have our own unique approach. While some people struggle to let other people get close to them, others become almost too clingy and needy. According to decades of research by psychologists, our early interactions with caregivers influence our later behavior in adult relationships.

Psychologist John Bowlby described attachment as an emotional bond that influences behavior throughout life. Childhood attachment styles are based upon the infant-caregiver relationship and research has shown that these patterns can impact relationships later in life.

Read each of the four statements below and pick the one that best describes you.

1. "It is relatively easy for me to become emotionally close to others. I am comfortable depending on others and having others depend on me. I don't worry about being alone or having others not accept me."
   
2. "I am comfortable without close emotional relationships. It is very important to me to feel independent and self-sufficient, and I prefer not to depend on others or have others depend on me."
   
3. "I want to be completely emotionally intimate with others, but I often find that others are reluctant to get as close as I would like. I am uncomfortable being without close relationships, but I sometimes worry that others don't value me as much as I value them."
   
4. "I am somewhat uncomfortable getting close to others. I want emotionally close relationships, but I find it difficult to trust others completely, or to depend on them. I sometimes worry that I will be hurt if I allow myself to become too close to others."

This Relationship Questionnaire, developed by attachment researchers Bartholomew and Horowitz, consists of four statements that each describe one of the four styles of adult attachment. The first statement represents secure attachment, the second represents dismissive, the third indicates preoccupied and the fourth indicates fearful attachment.

Check out this article to learn more about the attachment styles described by researchers and the role attachment style plays in behavior and relationships. You can also take the attachment style quiz to discover your own attachment style and learn more about how it influences your relationships.

Connect With Kendra: Facebook | Twitter